Man on tandem bicycle knobby kneed cyclists

I know it’s like Donald Trump saying his best mate is a North Korean but…..I am a cyclist. There isn’t anything I enjoy more than being out on my bike.

So I’m a cyclist but I’m also a motorist.

And there are some cyclists, actually the vast majority, who really rub me up the wrong way.

We all moan about those numpties who fanny about on the road. They jump red lights, undertake lorries, and generally ride like knobs.

They seem to think the rules of the road don’t apply to them. And neither does common sense to be fair.

On your bike

But, the cyclists who really piss me off are those who seem to take up more room than a bloody bus.

I am of course referring to the uniquely British phenomenon of the ‘stick-your-knees-as-far-out-as-you-can cyclist.

These knobby kneed cretins somehow manage to peddle whilst pointing their knees at quarter to three and wobbling down the road.

They almost always seem to be fat blokes wearing high-vis jackets on their way home or to work / the betting shop / pub. They often have a carrier bag of unidentified stuff hanging precariously from their handlebars.

Overloaded bicycle
Bloke on his way back from Aldi. Image credit: Paul Prescott / Shutterstock

It does seem to be an exclusively middle aged male thing. You never see lady cyclists cruising down the road on their bike with their legs splayed out.

Fortunately or unfortunately depending on the lady.

Girls on bicycles
No knobbly knees here thank you very much

But, honestly, the sticky out knees brigade really piss me off. Each and every one of them deserves a glancing blow from a passing motorist.

It might straighten their frigging knees out for them.

We’ve all got opinions

Do knobbly kneed cyclists get your goat? Or are you are a member of the knobbly kneed cyclists club? Is there another breed of cyclist who really rub you up the wrong way?

Let us know your thoughts in the comments box below.

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  1. Ha Ha. Yes I recognise the blokes you’re talking about. How the hell they manage to survive is beyond me. I’ve often thought about nudging their knees on the way past 😉


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